Tag Archives: Sixers

Diary of a Sports Lunatic

Stardate 042609. Feeling quite pleased with the Phillies three-game sweep of the Marlins. Truly filleted their bullpen. Opportunistic bats storm to the forefront. Jamie Moyer doesn’t drink cocktails, he sips from the fountain of youth. Cameron Maybin looks like a lost puppy at the plate. Raul Ibanez is the only man on the planet who has my full-fledged support to sport the soul patch. Need – desperately – to get tickets for next weekend’s series against the Mets.

And so our journey begins. Surely, there was no way to get tickets directly through the Phillies. Other mediums had to be explored, and thus, my roommate Lucy and I were forced into the most despicable of predicaments – dealing with online scalpers.

What a depraved, dishonest and dispassionate man the online scalper is. Hording away tickets that otherwise well-intentioned fans might purchase in order to make himself a buck. It’s bad enough that the Phillies have begun to attract teeny-boppers and frat boys who experiment with steroids, all attending in the name of “making the scene”; now, an honest fan can’t even buy a damn ticket at face value. Where were you during the Gregg Jeffries’ years, you bandwagon barbarians? Playing twister with all of the pink-jersey’d Eagles groupies, I’d imagine.

Ridiculous.

Though I will suffer them so long as they yell loudly when the real fans yell, and don’t make a complete mockery of the True Philadelphia Fan by stooping to the level of mindless marauder, feeding into the Exploitative National Media’s stock definition of our people.

That I cannot tolerate.

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Stairs’ Way to Seven – Phillies beat Rockies, 7-5

On a day when Christians celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ, the Phillies rose from the dead themselves, overcoming an early 5-2 deficit on their way to defeating the Rockies, 7-5.

Hallelujah.

Chan Ho Park struggled, allowing five runs in 3 1/3 innings. But no matter, as Chase Utley tied the game in the top of the eighth with a two-run jack, and Stairs sent another to the heavens and over the fence in the ninth, securing a Phillies victory.

And I missed the whole damn thing, enjoying the festivities of the day and watching the Masters. (Editor’s note: A bunny who lays colorful eggs and puts candy in your basket…I mean, really people? REALLY?) Ah well – a long season it is.

So, let’s do a quick recap here – after six games, or one week of this young season, we’ve already encountered worries over quiet bats, worries over horrendous starting pitching, and worries over Cole Hamels’ elbow (which he insists is fine). Continue reading

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What will the Sixers do with Andre Miller? The Pundit mulls their options

Other than the playoffs, this is my favorite part of the NBA season – the trading deadline. Who will go where, which moves will shape the rest of the season, what move will be a horrific flop, how many unrealistic trades can I get myself excited about after I make the money work on ESPN’s Trade Machine?

The possibilities are endless.

Except, of course, if you’re the Sixers, and you are quickly approaching a vital decision for both the remainder of this season, and the foreseeable future. That decision?

What the hell do you do with Andre Miller? Continue reading

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Elton Brand done for year – This hurts on so many levels…

By now, you’ve probably heard that Elton Brand is done for the year. This couldn’t be a worse development, no matter how you slice it. For those of you who don’t think he can fit into the Sixers’ style and want to see him traded – well, that’s out now, isn’t it? For those of you who think we need to give him more time for evaluation – irrelevant, now isn’t it? And for those who think that Brand can fit with this team and make it much better – guess you’ll have to wait until next year to find out, huh?

Excuse me – just a case of the Sports Depression. My first relapse since the NFC Championship Game. Continue reading

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Energy vs. Execution (Or, the Difference Between the Sixers and the Celtics)

What a heartbreaker. You think you’ve got a team on the ropes, especially after Andre Iguodala drops a huge bucket with only six seconds left. Clutch. You figure the Sixers will pay extra attention to Ray Allen and try to keep Paul Pierce within the three point line. Obvious. And so Allen takes the ball, and quickly dishes it to Pierce, and you’re thinking, Alright, fine, I can live with Pierce going iso, as long as he’s not shooting the three. If he makes the deuce, we’ll take our chances in OT. And then, Pierce passes the ball to the corner, where Allen, after slipping behind a double-screen, was waiting to launch a three. Crap, crap, crap…

Swish.

And just like that, the Celtics stole the game – a win the Sixers desperately needed after their latest collapse against the Nets – and did so without KG.

Sonuvabitch.

Looking to find a picture that accurately reflected my distraught after Allen's three, I typed "really pissed off guy" into Google Images. And for some reason, this came up. I mean, how could I not put this picture up? Priceless...

Looking to find a picture that accurately reflected my distraught after Allen's three, I typed "really pissed off guy" into a Google Image search. And for some reason, this came up. I mean, how could I not put this up? Priceless...

To me, the game came down to one vital contrast between these two teams – the contrast between energy and execution. Continue reading

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Would the Sixers be wise to trade Elton Brand? The Pundit gives his take

Let’s be honest – one of the most exciting things about basketball is trade rumors, concocting trade scenarios, etc. Now, I’m not going to go all Bill Simmons on you and play Monday Morning GM, but I couldn’t help but raise the old brow when I heard Jody Mac say that he read Chad Ford mention, during a live chat, that the Sixers could deal Brand.

Chad Ford: Yes … from what my sources around the league are saying, Brand is available. The question is, given how poorly he’s played this year and his huge contract, does anyone want him?

Chad Ford: I’ve wondered about a Rasheed Wallace for Brand swap but doubt Joe D wants to invest that much money right now on Brand

Whoa. Continue reading

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There are some pretty good teams in Philly – Are you having as hard of a time caring, after the Eagles, as the Pundit is?

Quick comparison: He Got Game vs. Above the Rim. Both center around the lives of superstar high-school basketball players raised in the inner-city. However, each focuses on a different stage in the player’s personal development – He Got Game is about the corrupt politics of the recruiting system, and how a young basketball player’s life becomes a commodity to countless people. Above the Rim, however, focuses on how the cruel realities – and influences – of the streets can cause many young men, with great potential, to leave it underdeveloped, and largely, unrecognized.

Here, Birdie pulls a razor blade out of his mouth. Or he does some kind of magic trick where he makes it look like he pulled a razor blade out of his mouth. I'm just a whiteboy from the 'burbs - I don't know how these things go...

Here, in a scene from Above the Rim, Birdie, played by the late Tupac Shakur, pulls a razor blade out of his mouth. Or, he does some kind of magic trick where he makes it look as though he pulled a razor blade out of his mouth. I'm just a whiteboy originally from the 'burbs - I don't know how these things go.

Wait a second – why in the hell am I talking about this? Continue reading

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The Pundit hands out some hardware for Philly’s best this year – It’s the first annual Punny Awards!

(Editor’s note: Ah, New Year’s. A time of year for all of the various articles handing out “best-of-the-year” awards to come pouring out. Not to be outdone, The Pundit has joined in the holiday tradition with his first annual “Punny Awards.” One quick note: These awards will not include the current Flyers, Sixers, or any of the college basketball teams. Everything will be from teams that played the majority of their season in 2008. On to the awards!)

Award shows are really where it’s at. I mean, they’re so ridiculous. Famous audience members pretending to not posture for the camera. Cheesy video montages. And, my favorite, the poorly scripted and unenthusiastically delivered introductions to each award by disinterested celebrities who are probably half-tanked. I think that’s how we’ll run the Punnies.

And so, with that in mind, please put your hands together for Samuel L. Jackson, who will be presenting the Punny for Quote of the Year. Continue reading

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Elton Brand injured: The Pundit fears the damage caused may go beyond a shoulder

Oh boy. Elton Brand dislocated his shoulder, which might open up an entire can of worms. Why, you ask?

an excellent choice for those looking to add a bit of protein to their diet.

Ah, the old can of worms: an excellent choice for those looking to add a bit of protein to their diet.

Well, what happens if the Sixers start winning? What happens if they revert back to the style they were playing last year, and achieve success doing so?

The answer to these questions, my dearest Watsons, is elementary: the Sixers’ biggest free agent signing in years will be perceived to be a bad move.

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The Pundit’s Power Rankings: Meetings in Vegas, Portis is pissed, and Harrell can just stay home

Unlike traditional Power Rankings, which attempt to rank teams on a week-to-week basis, the Pundit’s Power Rankings avoid such arbitrary silliness. Instead, The Pundit wishes only to rank the pertinence, scope, and conversational value of the top sports stories of the week. Extra points for any stories that lend themselves to relentless mockery and high-horse rhetoric. On to the Rankings!

1. The Winter Meetings

They say, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. In baseball’s case, what happens in Vegas ends up in New York. The Yankees and the Mets were the biggest players during the Winter meetings, with the Yankees landing free agency’s biggest prize, CC Sabathia. Plus, it looks like they’re going to snag A.J. Burnett. (Editor’s note: Damn Yankees). The Mets added pitching as well, obtaining closer Francisco Rodriguez. Plus, they added one more putz to their roster- setup man J.J. Putz, that is. (Editor’s note: Wow, never saw that first-rate zinger coming). Or, as they’re saying in New York: J.J. Pootz. Hah. Still waiting to see where big-namers like Manny Ramirez, Mark Teixeira and Derek Lowe wind up. And the rest of the National League can breathe a bit easier, as for now, talks between the Cubs and Padres over Jake Peavy are dead. May they rest in peace, and never, ever come back to life. Stay tuned.

2. Clinton Portis vs. Jim Zorn?

Clinton Portis was unhappy about being on the bench in the second half of a loss against the Ravens this past week, and he exclaimed his anger on a local D.C. radio program, going so far as to sarcastically call Zorn a “genius.” Then, it leaked that many of the players weren’t happy with Zorn’s habit of talking to the media about the specific mistakes made by players during games, and apparentely, some of the playcalling. Fun stuff in Washington, especially for a team that has dropped four of their last five games. Though, maybe this type of thing shouldn’t surprise us from Portis anymore…

What in the hell...?

What in the hell...?

3. Heisman Ceremony minus Harrell

Coach Mike Leech was pissed that Harrell wasn’t invited to New York. Many members of the National Media were pissed that Harrell wasn’t invited to New York. Me? Eh, doesn’t bother me – for me, the contest was between the three guys they picked. Though Harrell put up some sick numbers: 4,747 passing yards, 41 passing TD’s, 6 rushing TD’s, 7 INT’s, a 71.5% completion percentage. Let’s be honest: if Texas Tech plays at least a competitive game against Oklahoma, he gets the invite. It’s all about the last impression you leave people, and unfortunetely for Mr. Harrell, his cost him dearly.

4. The Cowboys in disarray

Jerry Jones is calling out Marion Barber for not playing through his injury? TO thinks there is some sort of conspiracy going on between Tony Romo and Jason Witten to get Witten, and not TO, the ball? The Cowboys are the perfect example of why you can look lovely on paper, but if you have no chemistry, all the paper in the world can’t ensure a championship. Jerry Jones, shut your mouth, and let your players play. TO, just shut your mouth, period. Why wouldn’t Romo want to get you, one of the most talented recievers in football, the ball? You normally make him look good – accept the fact that sometimes, the defense will dictate who Romo throws the ball to. It’s common sense, isn’t it? I guess it’s just TO’s world, and we’re polluting it, apparently.

5. Jimmy V Week

“Cancer can take away all my physical abilities. It cannot touch my mind, it cannot touch my heart and it cannot touch my soul. And those three things are going to carry on forever.” – Jim Valvano

If you can watch the speech he gave at the 1993 ESPY’s and not get a little choked up, you are probably a robot. Jim Valvano was a great example of how sports can extend beyond the field and impact the lives of so many people. Wins and losses, they fade in time. Some things live on.

“To me, there are three things we all should do every day. We should do this every day of our lives. Number one is laugh. You should laugh every day. Number two is think. You should spend some time in thought. Number three is, you should have your emotions moved to tears, could be happiness or joy. But think about it. If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that’s a full day. That’s a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you’re going to have something special.”

Amen.

6. Injunction suspended for NFL players

Looks like the Vikings and Saints can breathe easy, as they will likely keep their players for the playoff push. This was a bigger story last week, and I still think it’s fishy that the judge who ruled on this presides in Minnesota, but whatever. I mean, is anybody all that scared of the Vikings or Saints, anyway?

Viiiiiiiiiictory!

Viiiiiiiiiictory!

7. Carmelo Anthony goes for 33 in one quarter

I mean, that’s just ridiculous. 33 in a quarter? Unheard of. Melo’s got game, son, for real for real. Let’s put that into perspective: not one Sixer has gone over 33 points in a single game this year! Which is probably as sad for the Sixers as it is impressive of Melo.

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