Stardate 042609. Feeling quite pleased with the Phillies three-game sweep of the Marlins. Truly filleted their bullpen. Opportunistic bats storm to the forefront. Jamie Moyer doesn’t drink cocktails, he sips from the fountain of youth. Cameron Maybin looks like a lost puppy at the plate. Raul Ibanez is the only man on the planet who has my full-fledged support to sport the soul patch. Need – desperately – to get tickets for next weekend’s series against the Mets.
And so our journey begins. Surely, there was no way to get tickets directly through the Phillies. Other mediums had to be explored, and thus, my roommate Lucy and I were forced into the most despicable of predicaments – dealing with online scalpers.
What a depraved, dishonest and dispassionate man the online scalper is. Hording away tickets that otherwise well-intentioned fans might purchase in order to make himself a buck. It’s bad enough that the Phillies have begun to attract teeny-boppers and frat boys who experiment with steroids, all attending in the name of “making the scene”; now, an honest fan can’t even buy a damn ticket at face value. Where were you during the Gregg Jeffries’ years, you bandwagon barbarians? Playing twister with all of the pink-jersey’d Eagles groupies, I’d imagine.
Though I will suffer them so long as they yell loudly when the real fans yell, and don’t make a complete mockery of the True Philadelphia Fan by stooping to the level of mindless marauder, feeding into the Exploitative National Media’s stock definition of our people.
That I cannot tolerate.
On a day when Christians celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ, the Phillies rose from the dead themselves, overcoming an early 5-2 deficit on their way to defeating the Rockies, 7-5.
Chan Ho Park struggled, allowing five runs in 3 1/3 innings. But no matter, as Chase Utley tied the game in the top of the eighth with a two-run jack, and Stairs sent another to the heavens and over the fence in the ninth, securing a Phillies victory.
And I missed the whole damn thing, enjoying the festivities of the day and watching the Masters. (Editor’s note: A bunny who lays colorful eggs and puts candy in your basket…I mean, really people? REALLY?) Ah well – a long season it is.
So, let’s do a quick recap here – after six games, or one week of this young season, we’ve already encountered worries over quiet bats, worries over horrendous starting pitching, and worries over Cole Hamels’ elbow (which he insists is fine). Continue reading
Filed under MLB, Phillies
Other than the playoffs, this is my favorite part of the NBA season – the trading deadline. Who will go where, which moves will shape the rest of the season, what move will be a horrific flop, how many unrealistic trades can I get myself excited about after I make the money work on ESPN’s Trade Machine?
The possibilities are endless.
Except, of course, if you’re the Sixers, and you are quickly approaching a vital decision for both the remainder of this season, and the foreseeable future. That decision?
What the hell do you do with Andre Miller? Continue reading
By now, you’ve probably heard that Elton Brand is done for the year. This couldn’t be a worse development, no matter how you slice it. For those of you who don’t think he can fit into the Sixers’ style and want to see him traded – well, that’s out now, isn’t it? For those of you who think we need to give him more time for evaluation – irrelevant, now isn’t it? And for those who think that Brand can fit with this team and make it much better – guess you’ll have to wait until next year to find out, huh?
Excuse me – just a case of the Sports Depression. My first relapse since the NFC Championship Game. Continue reading
What a heartbreaker. You think you’ve got a team on the ropes, especially after Andre Iguodala drops a huge bucket with only six seconds left. Clutch. You figure the Sixers will pay extra attention to Ray Allen and try to keep Paul Pierce within the three point line. Obvious. And so Allen takes the ball, and quickly dishes it to Pierce, and you’re thinking, Alright, fine, I can live with Pierce going iso, as long as he’s not shooting the three. If he makes the deuce, we’ll take our chances in OT. And then, Pierce passes the ball to the corner, where Allen, after slipping behind a double-screen, was waiting to launch a three. Crap, crap, crap…
And just like that, the Celtics stole the game – a win the Sixers desperately needed after their latest collapse against the Nets – and did so without KG.
Looking to find a picture that accurately reflected my distraught after Allen's three, I typed "really pissed off guy" into a Google Image search. And for some reason, this came up. I mean, how could I not put this up? Priceless...
To me, the game came down to one vital contrast between these two teams – the contrast between energy and execution. Continue reading
Let’s be honest – one of the most exciting things about basketball is trade rumors, concocting trade scenarios, etc. Now, I’m not going to go all Bill Simmons on you and play Monday Morning GM, but I couldn’t help but raise the old brow when I heard Jody Mac say that he read Chad Ford mention, during a live chat, that the Sixers could deal Brand.
Chad Ford: Yes … from what my sources around the league are saying, Brand is available. The question is, given how poorly he’s played this year and his huge contract, does anyone want him?
Chad Ford: I’ve wondered about a Rasheed Wallace for Brand swap but doubt Joe D wants to invest that much money right now on Brand
Whoa. Continue reading
Quick comparison: He Got Game vs. Above the Rim. Both center around the lives of superstar high-school basketball players raised in the inner-city. However, each focuses on a different stage in the player’s personal development – He Got Game is about the corrupt politics of the recruiting system, and how a young basketball player’s life becomes a commodity to countless people. Above the Rim, however, focuses on how the cruel realities – and influences – of the streets can cause many young men, with great potential, to leave it underdeveloped, and largely, unrecognized.
Here, in a scene from Above the Rim, Birdie, played by the late Tupac Shakur, pulls a razor blade out of his mouth. Or, he does some kind of magic trick where he makes it look as though he pulled a razor blade out of his mouth. I'm just a whiteboy originally from the 'burbs - I don't know how these things go.
Wait a second – why in the hell am I talking about this? Continue reading