Tag Archives: Al Davis

Terrell Owens is now a Buffalo Bill…wait, what?

That’s not a lie. I was working late last night, so I had no idea, but sure enough, it’s true.

Terrell Owens is a Buffalo Bill.

Ahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Continue reading

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So Brett Favre is retiring, is he? Right…here are a few more things that might actually “happen”

So Mr. Favre is retiring…again. Right. I’ll believe it when the Jets (Editor’s note: Or Vikings and Bears, for that matter) take their first snap without him next season. It’s probably time that Brett “The Gritman” Favre took his leave – his last few years in the league have been clouded by too much controversy and conflict. It kind of hampered the whole “boyish exuberance” thing he had going for him out on the field.

brett-favre-mouth-open12

And that’s why we all loved him, wasn’t it?

So, in honor of Favre’s “retirement,” I’ve come up with some other news of the ol’ double-quote variety. We’ll call it the “Broken News.” In other words, here are some headlines that you would probably be wary of, and likely doubt almost instantly, were you to read them in the paper or on your computer. To the back page!

Pac-Man Jones claims he’s cleaned up act, changed lifestyle

O.J. Simpson swears he’s innocent

Of anything. It doesn’t matter what – you wouldn’t believe him. He could say he was black, and you wouldn’t believe him. Nope,  you would just shake your head at him in disappointed disbelief, the same way your grandparents did when they knew you were lying.

Accused Ballplayer X denies knowing substances were banned, insists everyone was doing it.

Eagles Front Office, Andy Reid says team is “close” Continue reading

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Rants, Raves and Notes – Talkin’ some football

Ryan Jacobs

α: When Roger Goodell came into the league, many people (like me), were curious as to how this man was going to run, arguably, the best structured professional sporting league in the world. Goodell had many issues to deal with from the moment that he took the reins from Paul Tagliabue. One of the more prominent issues he needed to address was player misconduct. Well, Goodell came riding in on an iron horse and smashed the league back into order under his moral and ethically guided system of rules. (Editor’s note: What is an iron horse?) He sent Michael Vick to trial, suspended Pacman Jones for an entire season, and Chris Henry for half a year. I thought the guy had some balls. Coming into this league and making so many statements impressed me and others across the land. It seemed like the league had found a young king to lead their organization into a new era.

Things have changed a little bit since Goodell’s first year though. Nowadays, players are getting fined the equivalent of an Acura for simply questioning calls made by officials. The latest of these came when Randy Moss was fined 20 grand for claiming that some of the calls made by the officials during their week 9 loss to the Colts were “iffy”. In comparison to some of the things muttered by Moss in the past, this was child’s play (and probably shouldn’t have made headlines). I couldn’t fucking believe it! I mean, get real, man! 20 G’s for that? You’re off your flippin’ rocker! (Editor’s note: Now, let’s not go throwing stones…) Fortunately, the fine was later rescinded by league officials who actually have a fucking brain in their skulls, but the message was clear: The NFL League Office no longer recognizes the First Amendment of the United States Constitution….you know, the one about free speech and all, especially when the comment is made in defense of your team. Unbelievable. (Editor’s note: I plead the fiff!)

I mean, if you cannot make critical statements against blown calls, then you’re saying that referees are perfect. And if you’ve been paying attention to the NFL this year, you know there have been a slew of poor calls that have screwed many teams; and think, we just only passed the halfway mark in the season. I know it must be tough for refs, what with all of the hell they take for bad calls (Editor’s note: And those silly uniforms). But this is how I see it: you’re making good money officiating football games and you know you’re gonna be under heat for some of the calls that you and your crew make. If you aren’t ready to step up to the damn plate, then don’t even bother driving to the stadium, because it’s a war zone out there. (Editor’s note: Wait, who called Kellen Winslow, Jr?)

β: The…Eagles…are…killing…me; soooo painful watching them play. They hang around in games just long enough to make you think they might win, only to let you down. The thing about this team is that they don’t have swagger. They seem like they’re hungry, and I applaud them for that, but they just don’t have the mentality and tenacity to make them a Superbowl-caliber team. Losing to the Giants may have slid the cover over the coffin; now we’re all just waiting for another team to come along and put the nails in. My friend The Pundit would argue that all 4 of the Eagles’ losses came by a combined 19 points, and all were very tight contests. However, I see a team that can’t win the close ones; a team that doesn’t have what it takes to get them over the top when they need it most. (Editor’s note: Like that friend you have that is always talking to a girl by the end of the night, but can never close). And this is the regular season, people – while everyone is considering whether or not it’s feasible to consider a playoff run, we don’t even have the intensity to win in our division yet, let alone the postseason.

The Pundit would argue that we could right this ship and get hot, and he could be onto something there. I’ve seen mediocre Eagles teams of the past collect themselves at the halfway mark and make a playoff run. But for whatever reason, I don’t feel it with this team, though I’d be lying if I said I totally felt it with those other teams. I feel like this Eagles team is writing the final words in a long chapter while getting ready to turn the page and start a new saga. There’s no doubt that this team needs some youth and some fresh faces in key positions. With all else said, I think our window of opportunity closed last season and I think it’s time to move on to the Kolb era. (Editor’s note: Or, the Kolb error. Who knows?)

I never thought I’d find myself saying that, as I love and respect Donovan McNabb more than I feel a lot of people do. A lot of people love to take turns shitting on McNabb (Editor’s note: Now playing for the Cleveland Steamers, number 5…), which I have often disagreed with. McNabb has been the best quarterback this city has ever seen and it will be like breaking up with a serious girlfriend when he goes. And even though he is still playing well, he’s going to get run out of town sooner than later. Sorry buddy, it’s been good having you. But if this season ends in disappointment (and with 2 first round picks), I see the Eagles making significant personnel changes (which might mean you too, Dawkins…sniff, sniff).

γ: So Barack Obama will be the next president of the United States of America. Like the young people around me, I am glad that change is “coming to Washington”. I liked Obama even more when he said that it’s about time to change college football to a playoff system. Bravo, Mr. President Elect! Bravo! And here’s a guy who has the power to do such a thing. I’m not saying he would even challenge such a thing, as the billions of dollars raked in by the greedy fucks in charge of the BCS is enough to keep most people away. But if the president decides to do something, I’d be behind him. (Editor’s note: Oh, I think it’s more likely that he’d be behind you, Jacobs…Oh, SNAP!)

So I ask you, dear readers, would it be just as bad if President Obama set the dogs loose on the BCS? I don’t think he should waste his time worrying about College Football, though I would like to see the BCS revoked. Arash Markazi has a great article about Obama and the whole college football playoff situation posted under his “For the Record” column in the Fannation section of SI.com.

δ: It’s been circulating that Al Davis stripped the Raiders offensive coordinator Greg Knapp of his play calling duties this week. While I can’t say the Raiders are good at doing anything, Davis is just causing more damage to, quite possibly, the NFL’s worst run organization. As one source said, “Knapp just happened to be the next in line scapegoat”. Keep in mind that Davis previously relegated play calling to Knapp even before the Lane Kiffin debacle began. The Raiders need help from everything from player personnel to coaching to the food they serve at the training facility cafeteria. (Editor’s note: Al Davis is a huge fan of baby food). But my vote goes to banishing Al Davis from the Raiders as the most important factor to turning things around in Oakland.

ε: USC has outscored its opponents 339-60 en route to an 8-1 record. Their defense has allowed more than 10 points only once: their loss at Oregon State when they gave up 28. USC is allowing an NCAA low 206.4 yard and 6.7 points per game. They blanked 3 of their opponents, and their average points allowed per game has steadily decreased as the season has wore on. Now, I’m not one to hype up USC, and I usually end up arguing with The Pundit over the validity of their defense, (Editor’s note: If I may attempt to rephrase his argument, I believe The Pundit often claims that USC’s defense is so good this year because the Pac-10 is sooooo bad), but USC looks scary right now. Everybody is giving Florida way more credit in the “one-loss contender” argument, especially because they play in the SEC. But USC is beating up on its weak conference the way it should be if it wants to be allowed back into the national title race. They are a good football team.

ζ: The Wildcat Formation. It’s the new rage in the NFL and it’s caught the eye of every coach and coordinator. The idea of getting one of your fastest and shiftiest playmakers behind center to run a zone-option read play is the new big thing. (Editor’s note: The Wildcat is the new black). After I saw the ‘Iggles do it with DeSean Jackson (and it led to a touchdown) against the Giants, I knew something was up. Could it be that coaches are taking something from the college game? Nahhhhhh, couldn’t be. I mean, to say that you dipped into college football playbooks would simply be barbaric, right? (Editor’s note: Andy Reid like DeSean Jackson. Andy get him ball anyway he can. Andy hungry now. Andy want food. Lots of food.). The coaches would be ashamed if people knew they had dropped to a lower level of football for inspiration. I personally think it’s great; just another way to get the ball in the hands of your playmakers. I think it’s time that NFL coaches start taking chances on plays college football teams are more likely to risk.

I’m Ryan Jacobs, and I approve this posting.

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Quick Quips from the Day in Sports

– Donovan McNabb is a big fan of President Elect Barack Obama, according to an article on ESPN.com.

“It reminded me of, obviously, when Martin Luther King spoke and the messages that he spoke about,” McNabb said Wednesday. “As a man, if you teared up, it was acceptable because it was that deep.”

The story fails to mention that, only a few minutes before Senator McCain conceded, McNabb had been vomiting profusely. Thanks to T.O. for that scoop. (Editor’s note: And, the sound of crickets). Don’t mean to downplay a big day in the life of Mr. McNabb, African-Americans, and our United States of America – but hey, when T.O. calls…

– Apparently, the Dodgers are making Manny Ramirez a huge offer to stay in LA.

The Dodgers on Tuesday night offered Ramirez a contract with the highest average salary in Dodgers history, and the second-highest average salary among current players, Colletti told reporters Wednesday… That means that the average salary offered to Ramirez was somewhere between $22.9 million and $27.5 million per year.

Most likely, the Dodgers offered Ramirez a two-year contract worth just over $50 million. Colletti said the Dodgers also offered an option year, but declined to specify the exact length of contract.

If somebody asked me if I wanted to play baseball for them for 2 years and get paid about $50 million to do so, I’m fairly certain I wouldn’t need to think too hard about my answer. Wouldn’t really be too tough of a decision for this guy. (Editor’s note: I’m fairly certain that The Pundit would wet himself in glee over a contract worth 40 G’s, a company Escort and limited health benefits).

– As is to be expected at this point in the College Football season, with a multitude of highly ranking teams losing and controversy starting to rear its snarling head, the old Playoff vs. BCS argument is coming to the forefront once more. Certain coaches, like Joe Paterno and Pete Carroll, are all about the playoff system, while others, mostly the ones who aren’t protected by national prestige and complete job security, “support” the BCS. Surely, the BCS has its strengths: every week, every high profile match-up takes on a playoff atmosphere. No game can be taken for granted, and no opponent can be taken lightly. Still, who wouldn’t like to see the top four, or even eight teams battle it out on the field? Wait, wait, what’s that you’re saying? You’re saying you’ve already heard these arguments, time and time again? Wait, this argument isn’t newsworthy anymore, it’s just rubbish being thrown around because it sparks the same old heated argument, over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over? You already know that a playoff isn’t happening anytime soon, and have resigned yourself to just enjoy some great football, even if the system for determining the National Champion always leaves a bit to be desired? Yeaaaaaahhhhhh…moving on.

– Allen Iverson is a Piston, and will actually play for the Pistons soon. He is excited about the prospect of putting out a duel rap album with Rasheed Wallace, and can’t wait to join the destructive riots in Detroit if he is able to lead the Pistons to an NBA Championship. (Editor’s note: Oh, that’s just chock full of stereotypes right there. For the record, The Pundit has routinely claimed that Allen Iverson is one of his favorite athletes – and this is how he shows his support. You’re an asshole, Pundit).

– The Raiders have waived cornerback DeAngelo Hall in another strange move by the Silver and Black.

“I’ve never been in a situation where you cut one of the best players,” said safety Gibril Wilson, another of the team’s offseason acquisitions. “That’s strange to me. It’s almost like we’re throwing in the towel.”

The Raiders waived Hall on Wednesday, bringing a disappointing end to a short tenure in Oakland. The Raiders sent a second-round draft pick in 2008 and a fifth-rounder next season to Atlanta in March to acquire Hall, who immediately was given a seven-year contract.

At this time, Oakland has not shown any indication that they will cut Al Davis. However, Mr. Davis has expressed interest in hiring Matt Millen for an advisory role.

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