Category Archives: Live Blogging

Monday Night Football Liveblogging

8:32 PM – First edition of the Monday Night Football liveblogging. This game is intriguing for three reasons: I didn’t expect the Chargers to start 0-2, Brett Favre is playing, and the game has huge fantasy implications for me. I have a 25 point lead, and LT is on my team. My opponent has Favre, Thomas Jones and the San Diego defense. I’m figuring he’s going to cancel some points out. Hopefully, Favre will throw 3 interceptions but no touchdowns, Jones will have a few fumbles and barely any yards, but a bunch of other Jets will step up and they’ll put 30 up on the Chargers D. Meanwhile, LT will rush for over 100 yards and two TD’s, and I’ll go 2-1 on the season.

8:36 PM – Oh god, I think Kornheiser is attempting to do Howard Cosell while performing a montage of Brett Favre MNF football moments. Uggggghhhhhh.

8:38 PM – I’ll be throwing some Phils coverage into the mix, as well. 2-2 in the 7th. Let’s go, boys.

8:42 PM – A nice screen pass to Thomas Jones. That hurts me twice in fantasy. According to Jaws, tonight is going to be Brett Favre’s “coming out party” with the Jets. I wonder when Kornheiser will have his coming out party. (Editor’s note: That’s not right).

8:46 PM – Rudy Seanez coming into the game for J.A. Happ. Wrap it up, Rudy.

8:47 PM – I am praying that LT’s toe feels nice tonight. Inject that bad boy with Lidocaine or whatever the hell they use.

8:54 PM – Rivers is looking a bit shaky right now. Almost threw another pick. Hey, Rivers – knock it off. I need LT with the ball in his hands, not the friggin’ Jets.

8:56 PM – Oh no. LT’s wife had a bad feeling about this game for the Chargers. Guess this one is a foregone conclusion.

9:04 PM – Braves had a man on third, Jeff Francoeur hit a chopper to third, J-Roll made a great play, jumping for the ball and making a perfect throw to home, getting the runner easily. Game stays tied 2-2.

9:09 PM – Fumble by Thomas Jones! And the Chargers D doesn’t return it for a touchdown! I’m a huge fantasy geek!

9:13 PM – Chargers score, but it isn’t LT, so I’m pissed. Then, with Greg Golson pinch-running for Greg Dobbs, a pick-off attempt went past the first basemen and Golson ends up on third. No outs, Phillies need to capitalize here.

9:18 PM – Golson scores on a ground ball to third, speeding down the line and getting underneath the tag. Phillies take the lead, 3-2. God, I love this team.

9:20 PM – Antonio Cromartie returns an interception for a touchdown. Hurts Favre, but helps the Chargers defense. This has to be unbelievably frustrating for the guy I’m playing against.

9:24 PM – Worst possible scenario for me. I thought Leon Washington was going to return the kick for a touchdown, thereby hurting the Chargers D in points and preventing Favre or Jones from getting a touchdown. Instead, he gets tackled at the five, and Favre gets the touchdown pass. Still hurts the Chargers D, but Favre gets them back. My 25 point lead has been shaved to 8.

9:28 PM – Suddenly, the Phillies are up 6-2. Pat Burrell with a 3-run homer. Booyah!

9:33 PM – Chris Chambers with a long TD reception. Stop stealing TD’s from LT, Chargers!

9:42 PM – Phillies win. Magic number for a playoff spot now down to two. And another interception by the Chargers D, though it really didn’t hurt me, as I’m still leading by 8.

9:51 PM – Touchdown pass to Antonio Gates. If you would have told me that the Chargers would score 31 points in the first half, and that LT wouldn’t have any of those touchdowns, I would have laughed in your face. Guess the joke is on me, huh?

10:03 PM – At the half, Chargers up 31-14. In fantasy, I lead 106.1 – 98.9. Oh man, gonna be a wild finish, at least in my fantasy match-up. I need LT to start grinding out some yards to keep the clock moving, maybe get a TD in here somewhere.

10:24 PM – So, LT scores a touchdown and I miss it taking a break on my roof. That’s fitting, isn’t it? You know what – I’m out. Back to the roof. I’ll leave you with one final thought: fantasy football is both a great thing, and a distracting thing. Truthfully, watching this game, I could have given two shits who actually won this game. I was paying attention to fantasy points, and fantasy points alone. Granted, it gets countless fans into football, and I pay much more attention to the rest of the league because of my fantasy guys. But football purists surely must complain that it negatively affects the way people analyze and value football. Whatever. I consider myself a football purist, and I love fantasy football. Now, enough of my soapbox, its back to the roof. Let’s go LT!

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Olympic Liveblogging part deux

So, my initial goal for the Olympics was to do at least 8 liveblogs, setting the word record for each. Sadly, I fear I will be falling painfully short of my goal (Editor’s note: Surely the masses will mourn). Anyway, enough of my Preramble (Editor’s note: Oh, he’s so punny) and on to the liveblogging.

8:13 PM: So we’re starting out the evening with hurdles, which are kind of like car racing: you’re into the race, but secretly you’re hoping for an epic crash. (Editor’s note: My last epic crash involved Atlantic City, approxiametly 7 Red Bull and vodka’s, and a nightcap with a woman named Trixie).

8:19 PM: Early candidate for name of the night: Lolo “Rolo” Jones, US Women’s 110M hurdler. Okay, so I gave her the nickname, but she’s smooth and milk chocolatey, so I think it fits. (Editor’s note: Whiteboy’s got jokes).

8:21 PM: “Rolo” Jones kicks butt in the first semifinal heat. She just made a new fan.

8:25 PM: A crash on the first hurdle in the second semifinal for Susanna Kallur of Sweden. Luckily, she seems alright. So, the hurdles were excellent: one great name, all three Americans moved to the finals, and one crash (albeit not epic, but also without serious injury). What else could you ask for from hurdles?

8:31 PM: The “experts” are weighing in on Mr. Bolt’s celebration at the end his 100M victory. You know, when he hit his chest once and put out his arms. Was it unsportsmanlike? Was he mocking his opponents? Or did he have some mucous in his lungs he was trying to loosen? Who gives a crap?

8:33 PM: My God, Bolt is fast. He looked like he could have won his 200M semifinal by a few seconds had he kept his throttle up. Dude can jet. Oh, and Usain Bolt is definitely in the running for name of the night. (Editor’s note: A sprinter with the last name of Bolt – he automatically gets the award).

8:38 PM: The announcer just said, “Dix has got something inside of him.” Heh heh. (Editor’s note: Sad. And it doesn’t even really make sense if you think about it).

8:39 PM: Dix qualified for the final. I guess you could say he rose for the occasion. (Editor’s note: Oh, I bet he totally just came up with that).

8:43 PM: Good grief, an Irish dude just won a 200M semifinal. And in other news, a basketball player from Great Britain is favored in this year’s Slam Dunk Contest.

8:49 PM: Pole vaulting is so cool. Sure, they look a bit silly while running with the pole, but you would look ridiculous hoisting around a huge pole too (Editor’s note: Speak for yourself, buddy).

9:00 PM: It’s beach volleyball! With Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh! I’m excited! Don’t you want to murder the person who invented exclamation points?!

9:04 PM: Kerri Walsh doesn’t have her kinesiology tape on. I can’t believe the broadcasters haven’t educated us with an elaborate conversation as to why she’s gone away from the tape. Is her shoulder better? Did she think it became uncool after all of the other players started posing off of her style? (Editor’s note: We need answers, people!).

9:09 PM: LeBron and Kobe are taking in the action. What’s with the two of them showing up everywhere together? They were watching Phelps together. They interviewed together. Now, it’s beach volleyball together. I mean, I understand team cohesion and all, but at this point, I wouldn’t be surprised to see them taking in a steeplechase race, holding hands and smiling at each other’s corny jokes. (Editor’s note: Alright, let’s not get carried away).

9:16 PM: May/Walsh are up 18-7. In an Olympic semifinal against a highly touted Brazilian team. They’re ridiculous.

9:20 PM: May/Walsh win their first set 21-12. A bit disappointing has been the lack of terrible nicknames involved in the match, such as “thin beast.” That’s right, Dalhausser, I didn’t forget about your maniacal moniker (Editor’s note: I would have gone with “asinine alias”).

9:24 PM: A kinesiology tape reference! I knew the coverage couldn’t last without mentioning it at least once.

9:30 PM: I don’t understand why anyone would try to spike on Walsh. She blocks just about every spike attempt, but seems susceptible to finesse shots lifted above her or to her side. (Editor’s note: This scouting report brought to you by The Pattison Pundit, pretending to be an expert in beach volleyball since 10 minutes ago).

9:41 PM: May and Walsh win again. Same old, same old.

9:46 PM: Okay, so apparentely there is a Woman’s Trampoline final (Editor’s note: Does anyone know what time the slip-and-slide race is being broadcast?).

9:47: Right, so this whole trampoline thing is actually pretty sick. The woman who just went, Karen Cockburn (Editor’s note: it’s prounounced Coh-burn, assholes) had a ridiculous routine. Much cooler than I anticipated.

9:58 PM: He Wenna takes home the Gold for China with a nasty display of flippant bravado (Editor’s note: Groan). China brought their game face to these games, at least in the acrobatic events.

10:10 PM: We’ve moved on to Men’s Rings. I think I see Vince Vaughn lighting a cigarette during his warm-up. He’s got to be the favorite here (Editor’s note: This super funny movie reference brought to you by The Pattison Pundit, an expert in making entertaining movie quips since never).

10:24 PM: Not too much to report on Men’s Rings. These guys are ridiculously jacked, I feel excessively lazy watching them perform their feats of strength, and the moves don’t have funny names. Except for the Victorian, an unbelievably difficult and rarely seen move in which the gymnast positions his body parallel to the ground with his chest up, as opposed to the more traditional back up parallel hold (Editor’s note: I know there’s a Victorian joke in there I’m missing).

10:37 PM: On to the semifinals of the Woman’s 400M Hurdles. Queen Harrison is my girl; she doesn’t take anyone’s flak, you can see it on her face. Represent, girl.

10:40 PM: Oh crap. Queen Harrison didn’t qualify for the final. I jinxed her. Queen – I’m sorry (Editor’s note: What a jerk).

10:44 PM: It’s a vault-off! It’s our own Jenn Stuczynski vs. Russian World Record holder Yelena Isinbayeva in the Women’s Pole Vault Final.

10:47 PM: So, after hyping the pole vaulting showdown, NBC goes to commercial break and returns with…the Men’s 400M Hurdles final. Um, okay.

10:50 PM: US sweeps the Hurdles! Booyah. Angleo Taylor wins Gold, Kerron Clement takes Silver, and Bershawn Jackson, nicknamed Batman (Editor’s note: The Dark Flight?), takes Bronze. Good work, fellas.

10:55 PM: And now to the Women’s Uneven Bars Final, where Nastia Liukin looks to continue her already stellar games with Gold.

10:59 PM: He Kexin of China, age 7 (Editor’s note: I mean, she’s listed at 16, but let’s be serious…) is first to go. Or at least be broadcast. Of course I already accidentally stumbled upon the results on the Internet this morning, which really pissed me off, but its still absurd watching these girls flip and fly all over the place.

11:07 PM: Kexin’s routine was absurd. Liukin’s routine was absurd. Why, I don’t even know how you could differentiate between the two of them…

11:09 PM: Wait a second – they’re tied at 16.725. How can this be? And how did Liukin end up in second? Well, I’m sure NBC and their crack staff of commentators will eventually explain how this could happen, other then the obvious “home-mat advantage.”

11:13 PM: So far, the only explanation has been that the IOC has a computer program that, in the event of a tie, automatically identifies the criteria to be used as the tiebreaker. Thankfully, that extremely vague explanation does absolutely nothing for anyone.

11:17 PM: China’s Yang Yilin, age 8 1/2, up next on the bars.

11:19 PM: She only gets a 16.65, and we’re still “tied” for Gold. Still no idea what the specific criteria for the tiebreaker is.

11:24 PM: Apparentely, Australia’s judge docked Liukin more points than she docked Kexin, which cost her the Gold. So, I guess a gymnast’s highest and lowest score is taken away. If it is still tied after that, they take away the next lowest. After that, Kexin had two 9.1’s and a 9.0, while Liukin had two 9.0’s and a 9.1. It’s something like that. Yeah, not a big fan of both the Olympic Gymnastics’ tiebreaking procedure and the Australian judge. (Editor’s note: Kexin and Liukin each earned a Gold, so do what’s right, and give them each what they deserve).

11:42: Ahhhhh, finally back to the Women’s Pole Vault Final, where Stuczynski can’t hold off Isinbayeva, who sets another world record. We get to see all of three vaults. Pretty anticlimactic coverage. And on another anticlimactic note, I think I’m just about liveblogged out. It’s been fun.

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Liveblogging (P-R-E-S-E-A-S-O-N Preseason!)

8:02 PM: Just turned on the TV, only to go immediately to commercial break. Luckily, I’m not missing the sideline reports. They should be asinine, at best.

8:05 PM: Eagles kicking off, and I’m pumped. I missed the Steelers contest, so this is my first taste of the year (Editor’s note: He hasn’t had a taste in 7 months. We’re all so proud).

8:07 PM: Asante Samuel breaks up a pass. Good to have you, man.

8:08 PM: Pretty excited to see DeSean Jackson return a punt…

8:09 PM: …and Jackson gets crushed after 5 yards.

8:11 PM: Eagles burn an early timeout. These are the kinks you always hope will be ironed out in the regular season but always seem to linger.

8:13 PM: What is wrong with Reggie Brown? Hopefully, just a slight hamstring tweak.

8:15 PM: It’s his hamstring, and Reggie’s done for the night. Not a good development early on, especially for a player who has a lot to prove this year. Hamstrings are ornery and tend to stick around (Editor’s note: Insert cheesy in-laws joke here).

8:20 PM: McNabb gets happy feet with plenty of time to throw in the pocket and overthrows Kevin Curtis badly, who didn’t have anybody within 10 yards of him. I’m not trying to get down on McNabb, because I’m a supporter, but he makes some hideous throws from time to time. I’m just going to refer to them as McDucks from now on (Editor’s Note: I just had one of those at McDonalds. Deeee-licious).

8:25 PM: The Eagles defense is looking stout right now. Two series, 6 plays, about 15 yards gained for the Panthers.

8:26 PM: Jackson on another punt. He makes one guy look silly, then gets hit pretty hard again. Seems to me like he’s a little tentative when he senses contact, which is something he’ll need to get over very quickly if he’s going to be effective.

8:30 PM: I was just about to comment that the Eagles offense was driving in a very methodical fashion this evening, and then they attempt a stop-and-go to DeSean Jackson. He had a step and was overthrown by McNabb. QUACK!

8:32 PM: Sonuvabitch. Weather delay due to lightning. Weeeeeeaaaaaaaaak.

8:33 PM: Over to the Olympics, where we have USA vs. Bulgaria in Men’s Volleyball.

8:43 PM: Hooray, USA wins! Ah, who am I kidding? I’m not pumped up at all. Real Volleyball is not that exciting. I need sand, bathing suits and outdated alternative songs during every break in the action. (Editor’s note: “Sixteen candles down the drain / WhoaOhhhhhh”)

8:47 PM: Bob Costas is using a gigantic microphone. It’s huge. Reminds me of the cell phones from Saved by the Bell. (Editor’s note: Insert “Do-you-think-he’s-compensating-for-something?” joke here).

8:54 PM: Good grief, Michael Phelps is getting water in his goggles! OHMIGOD! I don’t know how he’ll handle it! Wait, wait, hold on, I’m getting something here, what’s that, what’s that you’re saying, you say he’s won Gold in every race he’s been in so far? Oh, yeah, that’s true, isn’t it? Huh. Okay, I feel better now.

9:01 PM: Sweet, Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh. Against Belgium, not be the first country that would come to mind when thinking about Beach Volleyball (Editor’s note: I’m still waiting for Greenland to show up).

9:03 PM: And, we’re talking about kinesiology tape, mostly because Walsh has it wrapped around her left shoulder, and apparently the other players are using it now. Interesting stuff, I know. Anytime tape comes up in a conversation, I go cross-eyed. Instantly.

9:23 PM: May and Walsh just completed a remarkable first set salvage by surviving a 20-17 deficit and multiple set points. They are out of this world.

9:29 PM: After a lengthy delay and several conversations about how Chris Myers (clear trash bag poncho) and Pam Oliver (hiding under tarp / using umbrella) are staying dry, we’re back to the football game. 3rd and 8 for the Eagles. And…a first down strike from McNabb to Curtis.

9:31 PM: Okay, we’ve got a wet cheerleader shot. This is an excellent development. (Editor’s Note: Hell, it’s just a preseason game – give the ladies some camera time, Fox).

9:36 PM: So, I just witnessed one of the stranger plays I’ve seen in awhile. The Eagles, in a preseason game, attempted a fake field goal. Akers ran off to his left to simulate receiving a pitch, and Rocca attempted a shovel pass, which was intercepted by Richard Marshall and returned for a touchdown. An odd set of circumstances for sure.

9:54 PM: The Panthers finally get a first down, right in the middle of the obligatory Lito Shepherd contract banter. Deangelo Williams rips off big run, the first big play for Carolina. The Panthers are driving, down to the 10.

9:58 PM: Touchdown, Panthers. Delhomme throws a pretty pass to Muhsin Muhammad who gets absolutely jacked by Brian Dawkins. Wait, wait, we have a challenge; looks like Dawkins knocked the ball out. I heart Brian Dawkins…there, I said it, and I meant it (Editor’s note: Yeah, I heart Dawkins too).

10:01 PM: No Touchdown. Brian Dawkins, you are the man! (Editor’s note: C’mon now, no Harry Kalas rip-offs during a football game). Field goal attempt successful by the Panthers, 10-0 for the bad guys.

10:05 PM: Has anybody seen L.J. Smith lately? Oh, he started? Hmmm. I’d like to see the Eagles try to get him involved on this drive – which has started with a facemask and an offsides penalty. Lock it up, Eagles (Editor’s note: You lock it up).

10:12 PM: The Eagles defense has really been swarming. They look athletic and hungry and have been tackling well. Granted, the Panthers aren’t to be confused with the Patriots, but the Eagles, with the exception of a few plays, have been dominant.

10:14 PM: Nice return by DeSean, who showed great speed around the corner and got some solid blocks. He did get blindsided by another jarring hit, however, and fumbled. Eagles recovered. I have a feeling DeSean is going to be exciting for both the right and wrong reasons on punt returns this year. You’ll be thinking, “Oh, he might take it to the house,” or “Oh no, is he going to get jacked up and fumble?”

10:18 PM: Akers misses a 45 yarder. A tough kick given the conditions, though a make there would have gone a long way to soothing the ever-increasing uneasiness I have when Akers is kicking. Can he return to form this year? A huge question for the Eagles.

10:22 PM: Lito gets a pick on an errant throw by Delhomme. Wait, I think that was some sort of creature with half of Lito’s body and half of Sheldon Brown’s. Hold on, are we checking on this? Can we get that? Oh, okay, nope, sorry, that was inaccurate information. Can we check on whether or not that will improve his YPA? (Editor’s note: Who is he talking to?)

10:28 PM: Halftime. First half grades:

Defense – A (a big play or two, but only allowed a field goal. Swarmed well, controlled the line of scrimmage with their front four and filling linebackers, were active and fired up. Yes, it was the Panthers, but I feel much more confident in this unit having watched them in action then I did before tonight)

Offense – C+ (looked methodical and precise early, moved ball well, McNabb did miss a few big play passes, rain seemed to really affect them, dropped 5 balls late, didn’t really establish the run, tough to read because obviously the play-calling is limited. They seem to have personnel that, if properly utilized, could form a solid offense. Receivers ran good routes, got open, too many drops)

Special Teams – C (not really angry at the strange fake field goal play, seemed odd to try it at the time, but I guess better now than in the regular season. DeSean Jackson showed promise though he was stuffed a few times and did fumble, Lorenzo Booker and the kick return team were anything but impressive, Akers missed the field goal, really tough conditions but would have gone a long way to easing concerns that he’s lost his mojo).

Alright, this ran a bit long, I’m going to call it quits on liveblogging. I’m always more interested in the starters during the preseason; besides, I’d like to flip to The Olympics and the Phillies game. Be sure to wake with The Pundit tomorrow morning.

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Olympic Liveblogging (cue the music)

8:16 PM: Just turned on the tube. Synchronized high diving. Thank friggin’ goodness I’m not missing this.

8:18 PM: I was hoping for a can opener. Or at least a cannon ball. (Editor’s note: Still waiting on the synchronized belly flop followed by the synchronized scream-of-agony).

8:24 PM: All of these dives look the same. Borrrrring. (Editor’s note: Groan).

8:26 PM: After two rounds of diving, the USA is in fifth. I think they need to bust out the flying egg.

8:34 PM: After three rounds, the USA is in eighth. Screw it, we would whup their asses in a chicken fight.

8:42 PM: I’ve got to be honest: I’ve been flipping to Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas during commercials, and forgetting to come back. (Editor’s note: Synchronized drug use is just far more entertaining).

8:54 PM: Why is Cris Collinsworth covering The Olympics? He must not know what to do without the expert analysis of Dan Marino and Chris Carter. By the way, a truly heartwarming (cough) piece by Chris as he watches a Michael Phelps race with Phelps’ mom. What did I learn? Phelps’ ma likes to squeeze knees (she was squeezing Collinsworth’s knee) while she watches her son race. (Editor’s note: Ah, so that’s what you kids are calling it today).

9:01 PM: Sweet, beach volleyball. The American dudes vs. the Argentina dudes. Rogers and Dalhausser got this. Though, it always strikes me as somewhat odd that beach volleyball is an Olympic sport. I dunno, they already have regular volleyball, and beach volleyball has more of an X-Games feel (Editor’s note: Because its totally gnarly, brah).

9:11 PM: NBC just teased me by showing Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh getting ready for practice. They should just broadcast that.

9:14 PM: Oh snap, the announcer just made a Paleozoic reference insulting the Argentineans style of backing off of American spike attempts. Apparently, that style of play hasn’t been incorporated since the dinosaurs roamed the earth. In other news, that joke hasn’t been funny since the…well, never mind.

9:20 PM: So, Dalhausser’s nickname is “the thin beast.” I hate thin beasts – not only do they terrorize and destroy, but they make me feel so self-conscious (Editor’s note: Pilates could help with that).

9:35 PM: They can’t stop calling him “the thin beast.” It’s driving me crazy. They’ve used it at least eight times now.

9:37 PM: The announcer just said Dalhausser got his start in volleyball after “he started going into the gym and just pounding volleyballs.” Heh.

9:49 PM: My God, NBC is doing a “Panda baby making” segment. And it’s totally, completely sincere. I mean, Pandas are cool as hell, but I’m trying to watch some Olympics, not the process of force-mating Pandas. They even give the shy Pandas videos of other Pandas knocking bamboo – Panda Porn! (Editor’s note: What happened to romance?) Thanks, NBC, however would I learn about Chinese culture without these segments?

9:58 PM: Coming live from the pool in Beijing, it’s Rowdy Hicks. An American announcer named Rowdy Hicks? Too easy. (Actual Editing Note: It’s Dan Hicks and Rowdy Gaines. The Pundit heard wrong. He’s written letters of apology and been sent to his room).

10:16 PM: Really competitive Women’s 200 Meter Freestyle race, as Italy’s Federica Pellegrini takes the Gold. Katie Hoff from the US comes in 4th. Michael Phelps coming up next in the Men’s 200 Meter Butterfly. (Editor’s note: Act like you don’t have a man crush).

10:23 PM: And, as expected, Michael Phelps takes home the Gold. In World Record fashion. That’s his 10th Gold medal, the most in history. Congratulations Mr. Phelps, you are the most successful Olympian ever.

10:30 PM: Alright, The Woman’s Team Final in Gymnastics is about to get underway. Team America has a shot, though apparently the Chinese broads are the team to beat. Oh, we’ll see about that… (Editor’s note: Whoa there, Tonya Harding, just relax.)

10:36 PM: Yeah, there isn’t a chance in hell Deng Linlin is 16. I’ll give her 11, though I could have sworn I saw a missing tooth. Apparently, the Chinese Gymnastics team hired a special consultant – El Duque. (Editor’s note: Miguel Tejeda was taken – weightlifting).

10:58 PM: Alright, first ridiculous comparison of the night. Missed which ladies it was directed toward, but apparently we have two women gymnasts who are comparable to Batman and Robin. Yeah, not exactly sure how that works. (Editor’s note: It’s science.)

11:04 PM: So, you know at the end of a routine, when the announcer goes, “And here’s the dismount…Perfect!” Yeah, I can’t help but add to myself every time, “In bed. Heh heh.” (Editor’s note: More like, “And here’s the dismount…Premature!”)

11:17 PM: Great race in the Women’s 200 Meter IM as Stephanie Rice from Australia just inches out Kristy Coventry of Zimbabwe. And, as has been the theme in the pool, she sets the World Record.

11:22 PM: Paging Mr. Phelps. We have another medal for you, sir. Men’s 4×200 Freestyle Relay is underway.

11:29 PM: Wow, that was easy. The American team finishes in style, breaking the world record by 5 seconds, becoming the first team ever to finish under seven minutes. Phelps got them off to a nearly insurmountable lead. He’s out of this friggin’ world.

11:51 PM: Yeah, so I’m done for the night. Thanks for reading along, go USA!

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